“Be Yourself” Bovine faeces…

I remember a time when all boys wanted to be policemen or astronauts. I remember when girls wanted to be actresses or pop stars or Barbie dolls. And I stood there watching them. No, not with the eye of a cynic (I hadn’t developed a dislike for the world just yet) but with the eye of wonder. I had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Almost twenty years from then, I watch my friends having jobs and what not. Of course, none of them accomplished their childish dreams, but me: I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. Oh, wait, I grew up!

Some people, like myself, don’t really know what to do with their lives. Maybe we just want to major in laziness, or maybe we just don’t bother with anything any more (code for lazy).

Sure, I’m lazy, but is it my fault? I don’t think so. Let me just blame the system for a second here (because, heck! Why not?). It’s the system’s fault that gives us childish hopes and dreams. As children, we don’t really have a great individuality: we all want to be the same thing! But the system teaches us to accept that we’re different. It brings out the artist in us, the lawyer, the businessman, the architect. And then the same system crashes what it has created by offering us extremely expensive colleges and universities that we either can’t afford to attend or we’ll have to pay off with an interest as high as Everest. And let’s say we attend. Then it crashes us by offering charming jobs like call centre operator or fast food cook. I may be lack of a childish dream, but I never dreamt this nightmare. No wonder I’m lazy! I was a cynic all along, even as a child! I could already see there was no hope.

Many want to be actors or directors, yet most of them become burito makers. Many want to be lawyers, yet most of them will end up helping their father in their garage fixing cars.

Screw individuality! We live in a consumerist communism. Or something worse. The whole “be yourself” slogan is just an illusion.

But it’s okay. At least we have the option to be lazy.

Unless, of course, you have debts to pay and family to care for, so being lazy doesn’t count as a great idea.

Well, screw this! I’ma be a saint!…

…Santa out!


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